Sunday, December 30, 2007

Misery

I hate this.
No, I loathe it.

Having to get up at 9 AM on a Sunday - Bad.
Seeing you got up because there's a water pipe leakage over your head - Worse.
Freaking out when you see your new, unread books have been given an unwanted complimentary bath - Worst.

[And to top it all, the books that drip when I hold them up aren't even the ones I bought for myself, they're the ones I got as some scholarship thingamajig from my dear, dear school.


Alright, so you can chuck the dear, dear bit, but I did want to read East of Eden and Ana Karenina! :( ]






Noticing that your Business Studies textbook survived the flood?
Conclusive proof that God is a sadist.

Thursday, December 27, 2007

Tic Tap Toe

A drop of clear
Glistens, and escapes the pored steel;
Rests on the finger edge,
Hesitatingly.
Unsure, cowardly.
But joined by a droplet new,
The show off then gets his cue;
And a journey begins.

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

With the dawn of redeeming grace



Its Yuletide season folks, and you better hope you've been good the year through cause THIS is my official wish list :D


For Aanchal, Prerna, Pratikshya, Ankita Needi and Kika - The marks, the grades, and the 'no-studying's! Oh, and the treat! :)

For Nikita - 2390. :D

For Disha -

For Akanksha - NLSIU, and respite from evile, scheming Chem teachers.

For Shalvi - Time enough to meet us lesser beings :P

For Sukanya - An easier partner. :)

For Geetika - More CNN IBN features.Some that I manage to remember to see. :P Oh, and a normal, functioning cell phone.

For Kunal - The happiness you want, and the happiness you need! :)

For Anahita - More posts!

For Shayeri - Respect for thy humble opponents.Commerce people can be fun.Roar!

For Nitya - A stable existence :P

For Swastee, Varuna, and all ye sleeping bloggers - *puts ice cubes down your back[s]*

For Shrimp, Harleen, Diya Aditi, and Nim - More occasions to showcase them dance moves, babbeh!

For Shreya and Tanti - Doing them dance moves. :| :P

For Radhika, Sadhvi, and Saloni - HMMing times :)

For Meha and Shivani - Survival. :P

For Kandy - Hugs! :D

For Shilpi - Boxing gloves.

For Ishani and Kriti - Dal Makhani. :P

For Jen and Sanya - A normal-ish looking magazine. :D

For Hooper and Saniya - Mujhko man ki shakti dena, photographs email kar doo. :P

For Harini - Since I don't know you well as yet.... more posts, getting to know you? :)

For Wacko - [quote] .......an identity of my own on Facebook [unquote] :P

For all my blogroll-ers - Nice [?], healthy, regularly updated blogs!

For everyone else I missed due to amnesia/plain stupidity/normal crazy behaviour - Christmas MERI hai! :D Gah.I sound dumb.Merry Christmas!




PS - My stocking yielded [among other things] a nail trimmer from my sister.Sukanya would know.Long, filthy nails, no? :P

PPS - My dawn is at 12:15 :D

Saturday, December 22, 2007

Stuff.

[Found this while draft-cleaning, dated November last year.I creep myself out sometimes. :| ]


Sometimes laughing all the time isn't such a good thing. People think that's all what you are. And when you've laughed at everything, every time, you reach a point when you can't do it anymore. You're not permitted to maybe, by some great natural law of things. You just can't laugh things off. You can't do anything. You're the one who laughed so hard, you cried. And then, when you want to cry, you can't. You're this great blob of something that exists. Barely. You feel like an emotionless sadist. You know you're supposed to feel bad because you've inadvertently hurt someone, and yourself, but you can't. The tears don't flow anymore. You hate yourself for being so cold, so uncaring, so hollow, so unfeeling, but you can't do anything about it. You just see it happening in front of you - you, sitting there, just being, your eyes reflecting the vacuum inside, the nothingness around you. You don't feel pain, you don't feel dread, you don't fear anything. You won't do anything reckless, because you're just not there. Because you're okay.
And you see yourself there. Okay.
Time stops. You're listening to a song on your iPod, and you don't know when it ended, what was playing. You're eating. Something. Maybe.
You know it all, yet you don't. But you're okay.
You're calm inside. It might be the lull before the storm. Or the peaceful smile on a dead face. Who knows? You don't. Yet, you do. Because you're okay.

And then, in a moment of blurriness, you let go. You're looking at old things, you're yourself again. You can't help yourself, everything comes tumbling out. You're laughing. And crying.
And then, it subsides.
Blankness.
You close your eyes.
You're okay.
And then, you smile.
You're "okay".

Sunday, December 9, 2007

And this...

....is called a post!
Mwahahaha.


Sigh.
*yawns*

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Mwaaaah and hellooo dahlings!

Okay, whirlwind week is over and I am back with a vengeance!

Last week was spent taking part in a blogumentary making competition for NDTV, and boy, did I have fun! :D Made friends with the Jantar Mantar security guard, a Bhelpuri vala, and a flower seller at the Hanuman Mandir flower market [which incidentally, is Asia's largest flower market.Betcha didn't know that.Neither did I.] Also played taash with three guys in a park and hit a six while paying gulli cricket. [Yay! I rule!] Of course, it was the on the seventh attempt, but you're not supposed to know that, are you?

Oh, and I found this.......um..man, who eats grass for a Guinness record, in Central Park! Freaky.He just came up when we were shooting, said he'd been on Aaj Tak, and Zee News, so he should be on NDTV too.Then this other guy came up, shouting, "Main khilaoonga, main khilaoonga!" so we roped them both in for a 10 second scene.And just when we'd finished setting up everything, this crowd had gathered that wanted to be on TV too, so we took THEM also, and by the end of it, we had a nice li'l chaotic scene : Sanya [did I mention? Our team was me and her] saying, "Presenting, GRASS MAAAAN!Ta-daaaa!", a guy stuffing grass into GrassMan's mouth, he eating like a cannibal and the crowd applauding.Oh, and people almost came and asked for autographs! :P

Today was the final, all-important results shoot.[Twas a competition, didn't I say? :o] And well, I'm not saying who won.Just that I was very surprised by the results.And very happy.
There.Didn't say anything, did I? :P

Anyway, so I shall be on national television, and so shall be my flick.1st of December, NDTV MetroNation, 10:30 AM, repeat at 3:00 PM.[I don't even get the channel on my TV!] I look like an arse, I'm wearing pink [@ Prerna], and signed posters go on eBay on 2nd.
Till then, ciao munchkins! :P

Friday, November 23, 2007

Is it too late for an introduction?

[Alright, so I realised my first post isn't really a first post so as to speak.Fine, so it tells you a lot about who I am [read:lame, warped out, and well, dumb at times, the kinda person you'd roll you eyes at] but it doesn't say anything about who I am.So,here.you.go. :) ]

I think
More than I speak;

I imagine
More than I do.

But I celebrate
More than I lament;

That is why
I am.

I stop
More than I proceed;

I gaze
More than I look.

But I live
More than I wish;

And that is why
I am.

Friday, November 9, 2007

Light & Dark

May the light of vision,
Conquer the dark,
The glorious ever echoing beams,
Never waver,
And shine through
Your life.


[Not an sms :D]

Happy Diwali!

PS : At the talk I had to give the fifth standard on the Environment Club's Anti-Cracker Campaign.

Me : So why do you burn crackers anyway?

Random fifthie : Because it prevents dengue!

Friday, November 2, 2007

Memefied :)

Tagged by SporadicBlogger :D



List 5 things that you want to say to people but never will. Dont say who they are.

  1. Yes, you're right.Its your fault.
  2. Your school, so what?
  3. I'm the bestest.Okay?Good.
  4. Anything on Pizza other than cheese sucks.
  5. ----------- [I can never shut up.Even when I should.Gah.]


Five Things I’d Love To Do Before I Die

  1. Sky dive
  2. Make people believe in themselves, and stop acting like inferiors, thinking their opinion doesn't count.
  3. Colour my hair blue
  4. Stand up for a cause, and take it to completion
  5. Write something I can really be proud of
  6. [Sorry, this list is too long :)] Make an entire seven course meal without setting fire to the kitchen
  7. Convince someone to eat the seven course meal

Five Things I Will Not Do Even If It Kills Me

  1. Give in to an argument without a nice, long ( and sometimes rational ) counter argument
  2. Read my Business Studies out of my own free will
  3. Do a Britney Spears and get photographed without me knickers.Ugh.
  4. Stick to people because they're labeled cool.
  5. Eat sushi.I'm a nice, considerate kid, especially when it comes to fish :)

Five Things I Do When I’m Away From The Public

  1. Practice my ispheshul dance moves :P
  2. Hog on food.Oh, wait.In public too.So what? =)
  3. Read.The public doesn't let me read. :(
  4. Hmmm.
  5. Go on, exercise your grey cells. :D

Five Fave Sentences/Quotes

  1. To live and not to breathe is to die in tragedy. [Jesus of Suburbia, Greenday]
  2. It is known that there are an infinite number of worlds, simply because there is an infinite amount of space for them to be in. However, not every one of them is inhabited. Therefore, there must be a finite number of inhabited worlds. And finite number divided by infinity is as near to nothing as makes no odds, so the average population of all the planets in the Universe can be said to be zero. From this it follows that the population of the whole Universe is also zero, and that any people you may meet from time to time are merely the products of a deranged imagination. [H2G2]
  3. Can you put an a/c on your dining table and get thandi hawa? [My accountancy teacher]
  4. Some dance to remember, some dance to forget [Hotel California, Eagles]
  5. We shall now have a little public speaking in public [English class]

Five Things I’ll Make You Wish You Didnt Do, If You Did

  1. Rebuff me if I answer your question with 42.
  2. Say, "You listen to Pakistani Rock Music?!?! EURGH!!"
  3. Order a Veggie Supreme for me at Pizza Hut
  4. Interrupt me when I'm proving a point.I shall glare, and ask pointedly if I am allowed to speak with your permission.
  5. Ask why I've taken up Commerce if I like Physics, and hate Business Studies and Accounts.

Five People To Tag

  1. Aanchal
  2. Prema
  3. Dish
  4. Anahita
  5. Shayeri
  6. Nik
  7. Wacko
  8. Sukam/Aku/Shallwe, if it gets any of them to start a blog :]

My Math skills are pretty non existent.
And I like it that way :)

Friday, October 26, 2007

One a penny, two a penny, hot cross buns

You haven't lived if you haven't ever had a typical Indian send off.A Typical Indian Send off [new grammar rules, let the hyphen RIP!] [TIS] usually consists of the following:

1.Your hosts [think the Mummy, Papa, Dada,Dadi,Chacha,Chachi,Pappu,Babloo],Kanta Bai,Bahadur Bhaiya,Tommy,Twinkle Toes coming to the door to see you off.

2.The neighbours peeping through their door, and asking who'd come over.

3.The kids playing football in the street stopping to make way for your car, and then staring exasperatedly at you while you sniff, and hug, and sniff and hug, and sniff and hug, for some half an hour.

Now, if you're supremely unlucky, you'll also be made to eat dahi [think : Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi], like my mum did before my first Board Exam in the Tenth.[I puked it out! I was so nervous, I threw up! :P]

Anyway, so last week, my mum went to Kochi to visit her one of friends from school.Like a nice, dutiful joint Indian family, all of us trudged to the door.And the nice,dutiful family we are [did I mention that earlier?] we also hugged surreptitiously, and loaded the car, and stood there, waiting for her to leave for the airport.

Now this is a rather aimless post.And it also not about the TIS.Hence, I continue.

Now this is where it got fun.A sadhu came by, walking briskly, when seeing us, he stopped.He was of the typical orange clothes, braided, and messed about hair variety, and had a steel katora for alms.He looked at a watch on his wrist.He seemed to be calculating something, and then he frowned.Suddenly, he looked up."Shiv raksha karega, havaii udaan ki raksha karega, de de beta,ma ki bhalai hogi" I grinned, I mean, there's only so much of havaii udaan ki raksha I can take.The sadhu continued, promising safety at a rupee a bone, oblivious to my cynicism.Seeing he wasn't getting any attention, he gave me one last remorseful look, and went along his way.The car left.I closed the door, just about to latch it.

Suddenly, I heard him.I opened the door."Number ek sau do kahan hai?"
I went out, pointed out the house and saw him amble his way; making his way to the house where he had to perform a puja.So we were the in betweens - a quick buck while he was early for something else.

I stared.He was being greeted with garlands and people huddled to touch his toes, while he had
an expression of utmost serenity etched on his face. In the distance, I could just about hear-
"Aap itni jaldi aa gaye, Babaji?"
I sighed and latched the door shut.


PS: Sacrosancity is constantly evolving, my friends.And who wants to stick to the old anyway? So,
Do you wanna Mata?
Oh a Mata,
Do you wanna Mata?
Love me, love me say!

Tuesday, October 9, 2007

His only lament.

A mind bogglingly congested array of buildings. People clamoring out, rubies on their necks and the diamonds on their cuffs sparkling in the golden sunlight. Enough distraction to confuse just about anyone. Just about, though. Not me. I could see my target, my salvation, clearly among them - jostling with the gem laden. His flamboyance brought that familiar hardness back to my eyes. He just didn't.....care.

How could he not care? Millions had perished at his will; wives, children, parents...MY wife, MY children, MY parents. He didn't care; his opulence continued, as did my destruction. The caring was left for me to do, wasn't it?

I had to carry the burden of my survival - he wore his on his sleeve. I had to deal with the guilt of still living while others ravaged - his exploitative expeditions were a cause for celebration. My vision fogged as my reminiscence continued. I'd returned home, joyous, only to find corpses strewn around. Shattered windows : the glass of my shattered dreams. How could he?
I vowed I would show him what he'd done. Torment him the way he had tormented me.What was my folly, after all? That I lived in a country whose leader was one he couldn't see eye to eye with? Or that I was of a religion he found contemptuous, and to uplift us [oh, what moral values] he would first have to control us, showing his might by killing us?

Did he have to climb through mountainous ruins, searching a pulse in his lifeless son's body?
Did his parents mouths get eternally parted, uttering their son's name with their last breath?

The wind brought a chilling shiver to my bones and broke through my thoughts.I shifted, readjusting my position.I cross checked everything, and whispered a silent prayer, as the bomb on my jacket ticked its last.

Monday, September 24, 2007

Me, write? iType.

This is for Prerna, ref: the comment on the last post :)




I write
Strings of words
Multi layered strains
Meaningful chains
Mutilated veins
And abrupt endings.

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

You know...no,you don't

Open my eyes
To blinding light
To scorching truth
To endless sight

Let me fall
Into the realms of black
Home of soul; nest of dreams
Let the saga then unfold
Let my eyes meet my soul

And then I will see
With quiet content
The vision not
Of what I could be
But of the being
I have become.



[If its any help in understanding it, I have a power of -2.75.Now read it again :P ]

Sunday, September 9, 2007

You know - 2

You know economists can be a yawn stimulating-ly unimaginative bunch when the new economic policy in 1991 is christened NEP.




New Economic Policy.

Saturday, September 8, 2007

You know...

You know India is a cricket crazy nation when the electricity goes for 3 hours and returns at exactly 2 : 44 PM


India v/s England : 2:45 IST, ESPN/Star Cricket



Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Diddle-daddle-doo

This is not another one of them posts where I have nothing to say, I go beating around the bush for five lines, and then click publish.
Four lines is easier :P

So, here's something to feast your eyes on.



Oh, by the way.
Happy Independence Day :)


That isn't me, in case you're wondering. Though I did fly kites.And oooh, I cut two too! :D
My own, though :|

Thursday, August 2, 2007

Stereotypes Part 1

The first question I got asked at tuition : Science or commerce?
The first question I got asked at gym : Commerce or humanities?

So the Science people exercise their brain cells, and the Humanities folks exercise their umm, muscle cells?

And what about us?
Ah.We do both :D
All hail!

Monday, July 30, 2007

Outcast and rebel, reporting live

Long time, no post.I've been busy :P
Anyway, all that later.

So yesterday I went for this jagran/chauki/puja.Now if you know me, you'd know I'd be a misfit at one of these.Because well, I can't fathom blaring warped hindi film songs [Krazy kiya re, mata ne, krazy kiya.Krazy, krazy,krazy.CRAZY! :| ] exclaiming your love for God, and wasting money on getting loudspeakers and tents and what not.And then after proclaiming your devotion, you reverse your car, mutter some cuss words at the guy behind you, and whizz off?Thanks, but no thanks.

I reached.
"Didn't you wear puja clothes?"
-"Huh?"
"No salwar kameez?" [I was wearing jeans and a tee :P]
-"Err...nahi...mm..."

So temme something.And this is what I inherently hate about it all.Does my spirituality depend on my clothes? Just because I'm wearing jeans, does it mean I cannot believe, that I pray any less, or that I am shallow? Oh, and yes.Does wearing a salwar kammez automatically make me diligently religious and a true follower?Am I incapable of any sin just because I'm wearing something?


So you say my clothes dictate my beliefs.And my actions are trivial.
The blatant hypocrisy is enough reason for me to not go again.And I won't.

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Utterly nonsensicial musings of a bored bleuh-ger : Four dementions.

1.I don't feel like writing anything.At all.Its like I just can't say anything, and I have nothing to talk about and when I finally mumble out something, I make a fool of myself by saying some stupid unrelated stuff.Like this friend of mine said,"Hey!" And I go,"Europa's covered with ice, not mice!" Oh wait.DH is out in four days.Probably that.

2.Now there's this girl in my tuition [yeah, I finally succumbed to them! :P].She spells sets as s-t-a-t-a-s-t-i-c-s.And writes A={a,e,i,o,u} or A={x:x is a vowels in the shy alphabets}.And I'm not being stuck up when I notice this, I was just amazed at level of stupidity which is part of tenth-pass.Mr Ashok Ganguly, are you listening? [Of course you aren't.I'm saying that for effect] THIS is what simplifying papers gets.NOT widespread literacy.Widespread moronity.

3.I mean Ashok Ganuly, the CBSE chairman, not Ashok Ganguly, in the Namesake.

4.I have been blogging [well.in and out] for exactly one year and two days.


18th:English debate.Get zany march-past-uniform-turned-uniform-meant-to-showcase-authority from Aditi.Miss classes.

19th:Hindi debate:Rinse,lather,repeat.

20th:Interschool dramatics.Hmm.Get on duty and/or evade classroom and watch people make a fool of themselves.

21st:DEATHLY HALLOWS! :D

22nd:Re-red Shadow Lines.Memorise [try to][maybe] discussion-speech :|

23rd: Discussion.Watch as people watch me make a fool of myself.

Monday, June 25, 2007

In limbo

Would have tried something else had I got seven warlocks and an active volcano.Haven't.
Blog's on hold for now.

[Don't try making sense of that.Telling me I'm crazy is easier.Thank you.G'night.Its been nice knowing you.See?Telling me I'm crazy is a lot easier than you think.Just look at the proof.]

Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Passed.

So I passed my tenth boards. Now I'm officially qualified to become a DTC bus conductor. Two more years before I can become a driver though. Darn.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Taggie!

Tagged by the Fish.
Alright, so the ten things I love!

1.11C
My new class rocks!Its the best I've been in after 9C which was anything but dreary:catfights, patching up, teachers complaining about us, lectures by the Principal, NO studying,gangs, dumb charades,writing dumb poems in Shalvi's diary, writing dumberer songs for THE band, staring at the Math teacher[the WHOLE class, and then she'd wonder what was wrong with her], staring at the Math teacher when she wore her fave yellow sari with the yellow heels and fluorescent orange nail paint [on her toes...ugh], the Mussoorie trip, being the emcee at the Annual Day when the mic didn't work,the Math teacher resigning.
My new class looks promising....hopefully this Math teacher resigns by the end of the year too.
*crosses fingers*

2.Football in the rain!
Back when I was 9 or 10, my neighbor had just bought this Santro and because the World Cup was going on at the time, he got a football free with it.The next three weeks were spent sabotaging the back lane and playing football with all the other kids in our lane.But then, this woman realised what had actually caused all those dents in her car, and she didn't let us anywhere near it.We stopped playing.In a year, the lane got car choked [Note to self:Rapid economic growth isn't necessarily thorn-free] and we were left without a place to play.The football still lies in a corner of my neighbor's house, deflated and dusty.Sigh.

3.Velapanti with me friends
Usual sites of action : M blawwwk or ze Priya complex.We go, barge into some place and start talking [read:shouting] loudly.Try this, criticize that.Hang around inside doing nothing in particular.Oh, and it isn't without its hazards - we were thrown out of Guess once :P Once this is done, take unlimited rounds of the place; you're bound to meet someone you know.Here air kiss, and give them those fake hugs.Leave them with an accented,"Nice meeting ya, hunneh".Start all over again.
Lather.Rinse.Repeat.
Simple.And fun.

4.Imitation freak dancing
I love.This one is a regular budday party feature.Acting like you're doped and then doing all of 'em moves.So much so , I have me partners fixed by now.Nimmi and Hooper, raise ya hands and be counted!*Nimmi and Hooper say aye aye*

5.Cheering people up [:P]
Gelato.Chocolate.Lame jokes.Next up is singing Fix You in my bihari accent.

6.Acting weird
I had this entire phase in the tenth when Aku and I would talk to each other only in Hindi, which is kinda tough 'cause normally when you're conversing in Hindi, its okay if you intertwine it with a liberal dose of English.So we'd start the day with Shuch Subah [literal translation of good morning, though its never said like THAT!] and ask which adhyapika wasn't present, whether Aku had had a fight with some sakhi of hers and what she'd gone for bhojan.And the best one, Aku telling me she had to go to the shouchalaya.

7.Gazing at the sky at night
Siiiiiigh.I dunno why.I just do.Even when I'm not particularly looking for Orion.I just do.Even when there aren't any stars.I just do.Even if its just clouds or the Moon.I just do.

8.Finding stuff I wrote years back
Makes me think,"Gawd, you're just so good, woman!" Haha.More to the contrary.My fav fav fav is[and I know I posted this one long time back.I don't care.Mwahaha.So there]


All the world's a stage
And all men and women are merely players.
*faints*
Oops.
Stage fright.

9.Slumber parties!
And all the dressing up,parading,scary flicks and pillow fights [yesh Dish!Them too :P ] with them.


10.Early morning treks in the mountains
This one's more of a summer holiday ritual.Going to Mussoorie, or Dalhousie in the vacations and getting up at 5 to catch the sun rise, feeling the warmth creep up your face, watching the dew ebb away,feeling free.Fortunately we stay a li'l farther off from the city when we're in Mussoorie [Dalhousie doesn't have a city so as to speak] so its always fun just being.......yourself, and having time to think.



There, so I'm done.Thankee Fish, I'm feeling a lot better already :)

And I tag : Aanchal, Prerna, Shayeri [all of you are already tagged by Fish in any case, but I'm tagging you too...which means you HAVE to do this one!], Anahita,Geetika and the Sporadic Blogger.

Saturday, May 12, 2007

Lost and found

Darkness.
A stifling silence
Envelops the night.
It deafens.



A lone star
Shining through the clouds
Hope beckons.



But the night has but begun
And fear,
Fear crawls stealthily,
Moving its wily feet swiftly.
Silhouetted against the cinder black:
Grasping me.
Tearing me from within.



Then
A voice beckons,
Golden.
It streams through the darkness-
Embracing it,
Destroying it;
And then, in an unmistakable murmur,
It says,


'This blog is not dead.'






Mwahahaha.

Tuesday, May 8, 2007

It

*bows low before Anahita for giving her something to post*

Instructions:



Look at the list of books below.

*Bold the ones you've read

*Italicize the ones you want to read

*leave blank the ones that you aren't interested in.


  1. The Da Vinci Code (Dan Brown)
  2. Pride & Prejudice (Jane Austen) [Read half.Got bored.Thus.]
  3. To kill a Mockingbird (Harper Lee)
  4. Gone with the wind (Margaret Mitchell)
  5. The Lord of the Rings: Return of the king (Tolkien) [NO WAY AM I READING IT.Got the compiled edition from the library,squinted long and hard,read three pages,got muddled, returned it.]
  6. The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (Tolkien) [Self explanatory]
  7. The Lord of the Rings: The Two towers (Tolkien) [Self explanatory]
  8. Anne of Green Gables (L.M. Montgomery) [Made a lot of mistakes, I have.This was one of them.Read only if you are super optimistic.Or a 10 year old.]
  9. Outlander (Diana Gabaldon)
  10. A Fine Balance (Rohinton Mistry)
  11. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (Rowling)
  12. Angels and Demons (Dan Brown)
  13. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (Rowling)
  14. A Prayer for Owen Meany (John Irving)
  15. Memoirs of a Geisha (Arthur Golden)
  16. Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone (Rowling)
  17. Fall on your Knees (Anne-Marie Macdonald)
  18. The Stand (Stephen King)
  19. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban(Rowling)
  20. Jane Eyre(Charlotte Bronte)
  21. The Hobbit (Tolkien) [You seriously don't give up, do you?]
  22. The Catcher in the Rye (J.D. Salinger)
  23. Little Women (L.A. Alcott)
  24. The Lovely Bones (Alice Sebold) [Mine, they were :D]
  25. Life of Pi (Yann Martel)
  26. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy(Douglas Adams) [Definitely one of my favourites.Yeah, moi lurvey Marvin :P]
  27. Wuthering Heights (Emily Bronte)
  28. The Lion, the Witch & the Wardrobe (CS Lewis)
  29. East of Eden (John Steinbeck)
  30. Tuesdays with Morrie (Mitch Ablom) [My mum bought it.I picked it up.Read five pages.Put it back again.]
  31. Dune (Frank Herbert)
  32. The Notebook (Nicholas Sparks)
  33. Atlas Shrugged (Ayn Rand)
  34. 1984 (orwell)
  35. The mists of Avalon (Marion Zimmer Bradley)
  36. The Pillar of Earth (Ken Follett)
  37. The Power of One (Bryce Courtenay)
  38. I Know This Much is True (Wally Lamb) [And I can prove you're lying.*removes her specs a la Abhishek Bachchan in Dhoom* Wally Lamb hastily retreats and orders a change in the name.Mwahahahaha.*looks quietly content with herself*]
  39. The Red Tent (Anita Diamant)
  40. The Alchemist (Paulo Coelcho)
  41. The Clan of the Cave Bear (Jean M. Auel)
  42. The Kite Runner (Khaled Hosseini) [Amaaaaaazing book.Simple words, easy to follow, and completely moving..Absolutely recommended]
  43. Confessions of a Shopaholic (Sophie Kinsella) [Me can't find it anywhere in the bookstores near my place :( ]
  44. The Five People You Meet in Heaven (Mitch Albom) [Hmmm.This sounds like another one of those self help books.No, thank you]
  45. Bible [Read it in bits and pieces :P]
  46. Anna Karenina (Leo Tolstoy)
  47. The Count of Monte Cristo (Alexandre Dumas)
  48. Angela's Ashes (Frank McCourt)
  49. The Grapes of Wrath (John Steinbeck)
  50. She's Come Undone (Wally Lamb)
  51. The Poisonwood Bible (Barbara Kingsolver)
  52. A Tale of Two Cities(Dickens)
  53. Ender's Game (Orson Scott Card)
  54. Great Expectations (Dickens)
  55. The Great Gatsby (Fitzgerald)[Got it as a gift.Read one chapter...:S]
  56. The Stone Angel (Margaret Laurence)
  57. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (Rowling)
  58. The Thorn Birds (Colleen McCullough)
  59. The Handmaid's Tale (Margaret Atwood)
  60. The Time Traveller's Wife (Audrew Niffenegger)
  61. Crime and Punishment (Fyodor Dostoyevsky) [Ha.The same book Adrian Mole read when his mum discovered the porn mags under his bed, innit? Cool.Then I'm all for it, considering the other books he read included Why Children Fail]
  62. The Fountainhead (Ayn Rand) [Reading it currently]
  63. War and Peace (Tolstoy)
  64. Interview with the Vampire(Anne Rice)
  65. Fifth Business (Robertson Davis)
  66. One Hundred Years of Solitude (Gabriel Garcia Marquez)
  67. The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants (Anna Bradshares)
  68. Catch 22 (Joseph heller)
  69. Les Miserables (Victor Hugo)
  70. The Little Prince (Antoine de Saint Exupery)
  71. Brigdet Jones' Diary (Fielding) [If the movie is any indication, then I'm all for it!]
  72. Love in the Time of Cholera (Marquez)
  73. Shogun (James Clavell)
  74. The English Patient (Michael Ondaatje)
  75. The Secret Garden (Frances Hodgson Burnett)
  76. The Summer Tree (Guy Gavriel Kay)
  77. A Tree Grows in Brooklyn (Betty Smith)
  78. A World According to Garp (John Irving)
  79. The Diviners (Margaret Laurence)
  80. Charlotte's Web (E.B. White)
  81. Not Wanted on The Voyage (Timothy Findley)
  82. Of Mice and Men (Steinbeck) [Sounds intriguing, to say the least]
  83. Rebecca (Daphne DuMaurier)
  84. Wizard's First Rule (Terry Goodkind)
  85. Emma (Jane Austen)
  86. Watership Down (Richard Adams)
  87. Brave New World (Aldous Huxley)
  88. The Stone Diaries (Carol Shields)
  89. Blindness (Jose Saranmage)
  90. Kane and Abel (Jeffrey Archer)[Ah.My favourite Archer book.And the most riveting of 'em all.]
  91. In the Skin of a Lion (Ondaatje)
  92. The Lord of the Flies(Golding)
  93. The Good Earth (Pearl S. Buck)
  94. The Secret Life of Bees(Sue Monk Kidd) [I'd like to read the secret life of Sue Monk Kidd in that case][Hmm.And that is SOME obsession with animals...lions, flies and bees?!
  95. The Bourne Identity (Robert Ludlum)
  96. The Outsiders(SE Hinton)
  97. White Oleander (Janet Fitch)
  98. A Woman of Substance (Barbara Taylor Bradford)
  99. The Celestine Prophecy (James Redfield)
  100. Ulysses (James Joyce)

Hmm.20%.
Sucks man.

Bah.

Aanchal,Prerna,Fishdoodles and Geetika - I tag thee.

Sunday, May 6, 2007

Addicted.



Hmm.
That just might be me soon.



Monday, April 30, 2007

Dear Mr. Bal Thackerey,

I wish to express my complete support to the Shiv Sena's protests against Richard uncle snogging Shilpa aunty.I mean, what does uncle think he was doing, kissing her in full public view and all.Tch tch.What will Sharma uncle tell Pappu when he asks what Richard uncle was doing?

"Haw betaa, yeh kya dekh rahe ho? Quick quick, change the channel.Aah, this is better.Now lets watch this educational documentary on Khajuraho...."

Yes Sir, definitely, it is a commendable effort on your part.Imagine, telling your child that Richard uncle was actually *horror of horrors* kissing poor Shilpa aunty? Yeah, committing the same atrocious sin that Pappu's mummy commits everyday when she kisses him good night? Tauba tauba.

And anyway, these things should be banned.Imagine, how can anyone do what they [those inconsequential creatures that they are] think is alright, if someone as great as your almighty highness thinks it to be wrong?!?!

Uncle's "attack on our cultural ethos" toh you protested Sir, but what really amazes me is that you still haven't come out demanding for my arrest yet.Or maybe Prerna hasn't really talked to yet.That would be strange, considering how she's already told everyone within Hindi speaking limits about my despicable escapades. Anyhow,Sir, I would like to voluntarily offer myself for arrest, since I have performed the banal sin of making my d's as curvy and intricate as possible, and I happen to have a really good friend called Disha, so isn't it obvious that I am so completely in lurve with her? I mean, what could be more blatantly obvious?!

I am very sorry for going against our culture and showing such corrupt mentality, and almost nil morality.I hope you will fittingly rebuke me.

Sigh.I am really sorry to have gone against you Sir, but as Prerna tells me, I have to bear the brunt of my horrendous actions.I hope you will take strict action against me [but please, don't burn my life size effigies, because my gigantic size might make it difficult for you to make them life size.]

With deep apologies, and profound respect,

A very shameless blogger.

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Utterly nonsensicial musings of a bored bleuh-ger : Three ain't a crowd

So I'm bored and this is gonna be utterly nonsensical.Ah.Here goes nothing.

1.
25th April,2007 A.D.

Carmel Convent v/s Red Roses Public School [no typos there :P]
Set one : 22-25
Set two : 16-25

Gah.So we lost.No surprises there.But this?!




Yes, millord, in addition to being battered, bruised, and shouted upon, I beg the jury to see that my client was also blinded by a super sonic projectile smacking her face and was therefore, incapable to see what she was doing.And hence, she does not need to be shouted at the very next day, and be made to take extra rounds of the sports field.And therefore, is completely at liberty to sue the school for mental agony and physical torture, not to mention child exploitation.


Over ruled??
OVER RULED?!?!
Wha-?!WHY?!?



2.

And this is the discovery of the week.
Know why Tata-Sky sells like hot cakes Converse high-tops?
Instead of having a child lock on channels like most other stuff, they have.....*cough* a Parental Lock!
I dunno if that is an inadvertent error or a sly marketing ploy, but ha.
*mirthless laughter*
They sure know who's boss.


3.

[UNMBB without HP? In your dreams, missy.]

Would you name your kid Narcissa? I mean, what sort of a parent [even a pure blood fanatic] would want their child to be self obsessed? And come to think of it, Narcissa Black isn't even that narcissistic if you see - the woman was more concerned about saving Draco's skin, than thinking about what the repercussions would be if Snape chinese whispered to Voldy.


And unrelated fodder for thought :

JKR: "There is a character who does manage, in desperate circumstances, to do magic quite late in life, but that is very rare..."

On her website, "there IS a significant - even crucial - answer" to the following question: How and why did Dumbledore have James' invisibility cloak?"


4.

Bored, so bored...
Bored bored bored bored
I'm so bored....



Oh c'mmon, you can always Take [P]Lite.......:P

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Haze

Haze Blues Bar, Priya Cinema Complex, Vasant Vihar, New Delhi





So what came first : the name or the smoke?

Saturday, April 14, 2007

A Tale Of Two...

Today I went for two birthday bashes.

At the 18year old's party I had a Sprite.
At the 10year old's party I had a Breezer.

At the 18year old's party, we pretended we were freak dancing, and had a laugh about it.
At the 10year old's party, the kids freak danced, and I tried to laugh at it, but couldn't.

At the 18year old's party, the Deejay played I wanna love you.
At the 10year old's party, the Deejay played I wanna fuck you.

At the 18year old's party, everyone wore normal clothes.
At the 10year old's party, everyone wore clothes that would've caused the I&B Ministry to ban the channel that showed them on grounds of not being in "good taste or decency".


And if you think I mixed up the ages,




I got a return gift at the 10 year old's birthday.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Physucks

It just ain't fair.
The Commerce people get to watch movies 'cause their teachers aren't there.
The Humanities people get to loiter around the whole school 'cause their teachers are there but don't teach.
And what do WE get?

[we includes me,
right now.Hopefully, I'll be able to switch to Comm by tomorrow]

Yeah, ladies and gentlemen, we get to slog it out with weirdly accented Chem teachers [an-aye-YAWNZZZ] and double Physics periods.Oh, and an English teacher who's taken it as her life's mission to complete half our book [called.....Hornbill *snorts*] before Summer hols.

Wait.
Did I say Physics?
Phy-sicks?
Tch tch.
Phy-sucks.

Especially with apparently-Oxford-educated US.
One and a quarter hours of Units and Measurements and ta-daaaa:

The Physuckian-braino Theory
-couresty Vasudha W. and Nikita N.


The mass of the brain at a specific time = B , where B is expressed in kg which is a BASE unit.

Time = t , where t is expressed in seconds which is also a BASE unit.

Mass of brain before Physucks = B1
[NOTE: B1 >1]

Mass of brain after Physucks = B2

Duration of Physucks period = t

According to the PBT,
1.B2 is a constant, equal to zero.
2.For anyone in 11B:
Rate of depletion of brain = [B2 - B1]/t
= kg/ s ,which is a DERIVED unit.

IMP:
Rate for 11b-ians is always negative.This shows that the mass of brain decreases with an increase in the time spent in the Physucks class.

3.For apparently-Oxford-educated-US
Rate of action on brain [B2 - B1]/t is always positive.
This can be explained due to the fact that mass of brain in US is close to zero at the beginning of the class.Due to the presence of a higher concentration of brain mass in the people sitting in class, namely Nik Nangia, among others, some mass diffuses into US's brain.Therefore, by the end of the class,
B2 > zero.
Which means,
[B2 - B1]/t is more than zero.

*


Oh, and Nangia wanted to add a corollary, in case we get to share the [Ig] Nobel:

For calculating rate of depletion of Vasudha's brain:
B is ≥ zero.
However, for all practical purposes Bvasudha = 0.

.............................



Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Utterly nonsensical musings of a bored bleuh-ger : Two for joy

Ahh...now this feels like home. Presenting UNMBB , with all its randomness, yet again :


1.
Finally returned to school after three months, and the only thing I've realised it that three months away from school doesn't quite make the bimbettes sane[like anything could].But anyway, first day of school, Computer Science.The CS teacher, obviously used to the lack of normal people in CS by now, tries to get out of teaching us, and drones about what we're gonna be covering this year.
"So, apart from the history of computing, we shall also be studying programming..."
-pauses, because a specimen of the aforesaid species has raised her hand.
"Yes?"
"But ma'am, uh uh uh, I thought we would make programs in class XI....?"

Sigh.I should've told her that apart from programs, we'd also be making itineraries.Something tells me she would've believed me.


2.
The Deathly Hallows' cover's been released.Now, this definitely ain't my favourite cover yet, but, I dunno if you people have noticed, there's this thing which looks uncomfortably like an elf [Dobby?Winky?Kreacher?!?!] grasping Harry's shoulder and waving this sword which looks a lot Godric Gryffindor's sword. JKR's already said they're gonna be two deaths in DH.However much I'd like to disbelieve it, the cover looks *shivers* frighteningly ominous.

[More later in the Deathly Hallows post]


Oh.OH.OH!!!!
Anyone heard the rumours?
DUMBLEDORE'S RETURNING AS AN INFERIUS!!!


3.
Contrary to her describing herself as an uh...something Martian, recent reports state what Disha actually looks like.
Don't believe me?
Read this
Disha Pandey was in the News!



4.
And.
Bangladesh is my new favourite cricket team.

And the best part? Its all our own fault.If we hadn't been hell bent on Partition [we being pre1947 Indians] [and okay, the Muslim League and Hindu Mahasabha were the ones hell bent, but ultimately everyone agreed to it.So,whatever.] then, Pakistan, India and Bangladesh would have had a common cricket team.So, India and Pakistan would still be in the WC; Sachin would still have endorsements and would hit sixes, if only, in ads;and maybe, only maybe, I wouldn't think Shoaib Akhtar was that ugly.


5.
I think insanity's come a-visiting.


*





Tuesday, April 3, 2007

And incidentally....

Final Result for Award of Scholorship
under
National Talent Search Scheme 2006
and
National Talent Promotion Scheme 2006

Regret ! You are not selected for award of scholorship .






Regret! I was not chosen!?!?!
Sigh.
Darn man.The schol"o"rship was all I lived for.
Curse CBSE!
Curse NCERT!




........and she went to back to her humdrum life again.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Rust in Peace.

Swotted.Swore.
Learnt.Forgot.
Laughed.Cried.
Tried to read Why Children Fail.
Trying to finish it before the results come out.Need the excuses.
But then, oh well.Who cares.

THEY'RE OVER!!!




As Sh-aheli said, "If Winter comes, can Spring be far behind?"
Or was it Alec Smart?
Or.........well.Don't care.Don't need to know no more.Yay.
Life's good.


Thursday, March 8, 2007

The Slam Book Tag

FULL NAME:
Vasudha W.Or Vasudha
M. W, if you so prefer.

NICKNAME(s) :
The complete list for once.
Vasu.
Vaasu.
Vasu-sudha.
Vasusudha.
Boshundhara.[Umm.I ain't Bengali, if you're wondering.]
Mandy.
Madhubala.[& I hate you back.]
Mb.
Mikey.[Ah.Still tolerable]
Yuvi.[Not this one, no.]
Gadhera Wadhera[Thanks a bunch, shall-we]
Kid.
Vsdhaaaaaaa[Leave first syllable, exaggerate the second]

HOMETOWN:
New Delhi


BORN:
12th of August, '91.


CURRENT RESIDENCE:

My study table.Boards.Boohoo.

CROUTONS OR BACON BITS:
Croutons.Me veggie.

FAVORITE SALAD DRESSING:
None.I like my salad without dressing.Hmm....that sounds like saying I like salad nude.Uh...whatever.Rather not think about it.

DO YOU DRINK?:
Yeah.Five litres a day.Good for the skin.You're talking about water, aren't you?

SHAMPOO & CONDITIONER OR JUST CONDITIONER:
People use JUST CONDITIONER?? No siree, I go the whole hog, if you please.Shampoo, conditioner, serum.

HAVE YOU EVER GONE SKINNY DIPPING:
Okay, I'm chorofying Nitya's answer.
I don't have any skin. Just fat.

DO YOU MAKE FUN OF PEOPLE:
Who, me? No way.I just returned from a tiny cave in the Himalaya after learning pranayam from Sri Sri Sri Sri Sri Sri Sri-o-maniac.

FAVORITE COLORS:
Black.Silver.Neon blue.White.Azure.The green color of leaves with dew drops on them.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN CONVICTED OF A CRIME:
Well.Depends on your definition of crime.The principal once caught me with dirty shoes.[NOTE:That does not imply I had dirty shoes just once.I just means I was caught once.] Now, we have canvas shoes as part of the uniform.My sentence? I had to wash those shoes right there
and wear them like that the rest of the day.Sigh.
But then, that didn't deter me from not wearing dirty shoes.Hah.Its tough to bog down the unbogdownable.

ONE PILLOW OR TWO:
One.Or none.

PETS:
Well.A bunch of Homo Sapiens.

FAVORITE TYPES OF MUSIC:
Ah.Not my favourite question.I keep on having these bouts of obsession with different genres.Right now, I'm in my I-love-Pakistani-rock-mode.Immensely satisfying.And also responsible for the recent spurt in my Hindi marks.

DREAM CAR:
An S-class Merc convertible.Mind you, that's
dream car.

TYPE OF CAR YOU DRIVE NOW:
Two wheel, central drive.Oiled brakes.Taped radio.
My old bike.Oh.Bicycle-vaala bike.Which has being lying redundant since four years.

WHAT TYPE OF CAR WAS YOUR FIRST CAR:
Working, to say the least.At least it was when I came back from the hospital after being born.[This sounds weird.I came back....after being born.Jeez.]Lucky me.When my mum and dad got married, and were coming back post-wedding, the car broke down, and my dad had to get down, in all his wedding finery and push it ahead.Hmm.Must've been a weird sight.

TOOTHPASTE:
Pepsodent. Forced by my dentist.Easy for him.He's being paid to promote the brand.How'd he know how it feels brushing with a sickly sweet toothpaste?

FAVORITE FOOD:
Edible stuff.Usually.

DO YOU GET ALONG WITH YOUR PARENTS:
Yeah.Most of the time.

FAVORITE TOWN TO CHILL IN:
Yellowknife, Canada.Mean monthly temp. -29.9C.
Yellowknife.Interesting name.

FAVORITE ICE CREAM:
HCF at Nirula's.Sumtiliciously yum.

FAVORITE SOFT DRINK:
Hydrogen Dioxide.

FAVORITE TYPE OF FAMILY GAME tO PLAY:
Scrabble.Or Monopoly.

WHAT IS YOUR BAD TIME of DAY:
Afternoons.

FAVORITE TIME OF YEAR:
Last day of the exams.

ADIDAS, NIKE, OR REEBOK:
Adidas for sneakers.Reebok for hoodies.Nike for nuffin'

FAVORITE PERFUME OR COLOGNE:
Anything not sugary or woody, I like more of fresh, cool scents.

FAVORITE WEBSITE:
Mugglenet, Shurtugal (mostly empty though) , anywhere my overactive mouse pointer takes me.

FAVORITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL:
Surprise, surprise.Hindi.Just when I'm seven days away from my last ever Hindi exam.Least fav subjects? English, English, English, English, Biology, Chemistry,Geometry,Civics,Geography.

FAVORITE MOVIE YOU HAVE SEEN RECENTLY OR FAVORITE TYPE OF MOVIE: Recently?That's a laugh.I don't remember the last movie I saw.Oh, wait.Dhoom 2.Abhishek Bachchan looked about as fit as me.

LEAST FAVORITE SUBJECT:
Look above

FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC
DRINK :
Considering my expertise in alcoholic drinks extends to Breezers, Wine Coolers and a teeny weeny sip of white wine[all had illegally.I can't legally drink for 10 more years] ,I'd say Blueberry Breezers.

FAVORITE SPORT TO WATCH: Soccer.Or Tennis.

MOST HUMILIATING MOMENT:Not most, but definitely the most recent one.Last week, at my cousin's wedding, my mum wanted a coke.Coca-cola, that'd be, case you were wondering.So anyhow, I strode forward and instead of going to the non alcoholic counter, I went to the alcoholic counter.Totally unaware, I asked for a Coke.
And this guy goes like, "Normal?"
So me, obviously answered,"Yeah.Obviously!!".
And the guy went all red and answered,"Uh.I meant without the ice.".
----->.<---- CRAZIEST OR SILLIEST PERSON YOU KNOW: Me. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN THE OPPOSITE SEX: Literacy, first.And other stuff. SAY ONE NICE THING ABOUT THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU: Ahh....Nitya.Its kinda tough to say something nice about some one I hated with a vengeance once and was hated back with the same passion.Hehe.Nah....we're pretty amicable now.Nitya's nice 'cause............. she isn't ever afraid to ever to do her own thing.She says what she means and means what she says. PERSON YOU SENT THIS TO, WHO IS LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND: I haven't "sent" this to anyone yet.Let's see.I shall send this to.....Dish, Aanchal, Prerna,and anyone else who wants to do this, go ahead.Not copyrighted/lefted/centered in any way.

Thursday, February 22, 2007

Multiple Personality Disorder?

Well.Well.Well.
Now, we all know celebrities are well, pretty crazy to put it mildly.Substantive proof?
Look no further:




Sachin Tendulkar during a fancy dress competition in college.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Oh well.Happy Valentine's Day after all.

Fine so I couldn't be all anti-Val's the whole day after all.Not after seeing Shiv Sena people literally raid the parks in Lucknow on the telly.Making all the guys there bend over and murga-fy.
And I thought we were a free country.
[Were, not are.]

Anyway, Orkut's been decked up.....


.........and so has Google.

Hmm.
*sighs dejectedly*
So I lose.


Happy Val's Day!!


to the ze love-struck foo in particular.

Monday, February 12, 2007

Lackofinspirationitus continues

Here's something I got off Shayeri's blog...

Gotta love it......



Monday, February 5, 2007

Severe lackofinspirationitus?

Surprise surprise....guess who's just been named among one of the sweetest 16 stars 16 and under?

Not me, silly....her.



--Emma Watson has made Sweet 16 Magazine's list of the "16 Sweetest Stars 16 and Under." The list honors talented young celebrities who have avoided the Hollywood party scene and are great role models. Congratulations, Emma!



And yeah, according to The Telegraph....


Helpline for fearful fans of Harry Potter

By Nigel Reynolds, Arts Correspondent

Waterstone's is looking to set up a helpline for fans of Harry Potter because two important characters in JK Rowling's saga will die in the last instalment to be published this summer.

The book chain forecast that Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows would become not only the best-selling Harry Potter title but the biggest selling book in history. But that may not bring unalloyed happiness to the nation because of Rowling's warning about the deaths.

Debbie Williams, of Waterstone's, said yesterday: "This could be a similar moment to when Take That split up — there could be a lot of upset teenagers out there. We are looking to set up a helpline for them."




And lastly, this is what the New Blogger Tour has on the first page.



Don't miss the Header :D

Thursday, February 1, 2007

BOARDS. Pfft.

In the abyss
With darkness closing around me;
In a bottomless chasm,
Aching to be set free.

Slayed by the diabolo;
Solitary.Ruinous.Coerced.
I traverse the hell hole,
Compelled by fate; cursed.



Boards.




ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!







Monday, January 29, 2007

And teddy bears with red bows......

Celebrating festivals seems to have become the new obsession of the country. Apart from festivals , we've also taken to celebrating the Days of Occasions. So now you have Mother's Day, Father's Day, Mother's Father's Day, Father's Mother's Day, Uncle Tom's Day, Uncle Tom's Cabin's Day, Little Miss Muffet's Day and so on.......


The BIG new occasion in town, big enough to make you f-u-r-g-e-t that you're practically edging past 33.33(recurring)% is.....*hold ya breath* VALENTINE'S DAY!!!.

Now, normal Valentine's Day parlance is something like this:

You wake up groggily, switch on the TV.What hits you first? A news anchor wearing an obnoxious-looking red suit, looking as if he's just won KBC (with SRK, mind you :D), cheerily trying to get you as infused with the "spirit" of the Day.The news set is done up in red (but of course, they need to show they know what the colour of the day is)

Sample news on one the Hindi ones:
Aur aaj desh ke kone kone main Valentine's Day manaya ja rahaa hai. Deepak, hamen bataaiye ki Dilli main kya ho raha hai...
And Deepak, wearing a red tee himself, rants off about how he got his girlfriend a spanking new greeting card (hmph.what else?) and how everyone is going to attend such spiffing do's and have such a sporadicly "fun" time.

Sorry, but leave me out of this.
I don't want a white coloured teddy-bear (of all things) witha red bow.
I don't want red coloured heart-shaped balloons.
I don't want those "The Ultimate Valentine's Day Collection" CDs that materialize out of thin air around Feb the fourteenth.

If I sound like a Shiv Sena loyalist going on about the 'Americanization' of the youth, lemme clarify.
I do appreciate that you'd like to take time out for someone you love, but please, does it have to involve Valentines Day special edition newspapers?
You love someone, go tell them, but for goodness' sake, don't thrust your I Love You messages on my face.

And finally,
Celebrate all you want, but frankly, this isn't celebration.


And don't expect me to join in.




(written in a rare anti-social mood, frequently seen after exam results)

Thursday, January 18, 2007

But what IS normal?

She knew what normal meant. But did her life?
Normal was having a perfectly....uh.....normal day.But her life said normal was being ticked off by the teachers at school everyday, hearing them make snide remarks about her and watching them smirk in the bubble of quiet satisfaction.
She knew she couldn't change all that.

But then, she knew of the things she could change.
Let that badgering tweet of a teacher drone on about how extremely appalled she was by her long nails.Let her rant on about her dirty uniform.Did she know how much time it had taken her to get it dirty in that exact way?But she wouldn't care would she?She was no human after all.The twittering idiot was a teacher.

She knew she could get everyone against her.Sure, they'd mutiny.
They'd bunk all her classes.They'd throw stuff at her.They'd do whatever she said.
And a slow, curling smirk spread its cunning claws on her face.

The shouting in the background stopped and jolted her to reality.Aww.She'd forgive the poor creature one last time.She still had the fracture on from last time's rendezvous.

So she thought she'd give her life a rest from screwing up everything for her, and thought about how considerate she'd become for a change.Life had a weird way of making her everything she didn't want to be.Wouldn't last long, she thought to herself.Let those zarking Boards get over and she'd show them.She'd show them all.

The recess bell rang and broke her out of her reverie.Those chit-chattering prissies hurried out of the prison they called 'class'.
So what else was new.
She took in the scene she was now accustomed to.

She'd go to school.
Go to the last seat in the row next to the wall.
The single one.
The teacher would come.
The teacher shout at her.
She'd put up a suitably remorseful face.
The teacher would go.
And so it would happen in the next 8 periods.
And her un-needed existence would go on.

She looked up.They were coming back in again.Rushing, more like.Suckers they were, to be so afraid of the class teacher, that they were shifting to their assigned places.Gawrdie.Such wimps.

One of their tribe came and sat in front of her.As if she cared.
The gal shouted halfway across the classroom for another girl to throw her bag over.
She was way too unconcerned to see what was happening.She didn't care, remember?

THWACK!!!!
The bag hit her squarely (or whatever shape the bag was) in the face.
She thought a person who was pretty good at throwball in PE would be able to throw a bag on target, at least.But no, this was HER life.
She brushed away the broken shards of her spectacle-lenses.The optician had assured her that the new-and-advanced (an oxymoron, she had noted at the time) plastic lenses would be completely fall-proof.She should've asked about their being High School-proof.
Curse Murphy.

[No, her life didn't suddenly turn all bright and rosy. She wasn't born off Hans Christian Anderson's pen.This is the twenty-first century.You can either have blogs or Anderson.Take your pick.Can't decide? Mwahaha.I get to choose.I choose blogs.]

And so she trudged back home.

While walking to the Optician's, she realised it wasn't such a curse after all.The less she saw her unnecessary existence, the better.But then, she had long become comfy in her coerced life.

*


Drat.It was a Monday.The market was closed.She should've known.

*


She walked ahead, the only speck of dismalness in the road caressed by the azure sky.
The bus came.
She got on, after fumbling a bit on the steps.

*


The same routine.
She reached school.
Walked up to her class.
Went and plonked her bag on the last seat in the row next to the wall, the single one.
Somehow, she felt, in an inexplicable way, her life might just turn out to be normal.The real normal.Not the way she thought.The way everyone else thought.

A girl came and sat in front of her.Someone she'd never noticed.
The girl turned around.
"You....you've got.........Your eyes are actually brown", the girl said.

She felt a wry smile creeping up her face.She looked down, certain that her life had missed out on some vital English classes.


***********************

 

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